Although my son is only 81/2 months old I have been having diapering fiascos for over 7 yrs. Why? Because I have nieces and nephews .. :) AND I am a super fabulous Auntie who is willing to change diapers. Case in point - one day when my three yr old nephew was a baby, my sister and I were in the states shopping - he needed a diaper change and she was busy trying on new clothes. SO I graciously brought him out to the car to change him and allow her a few moments longer to shop. To create a more vivid picture; It was a beautiful summer day and I was wearing a white sundress (ahh my affinity for white strikes again). So there we are in the Walmart plaza parking lot. Z is on the seat - I lean over and open his diaper... Z looks at and projectile poops ALL over my white dress!!!!!! While I'm freaking out and trying to wipe off the mess (or at least the majority of it) that precious boy decides to help me wash off the mess by peeing all over me! There I stand, laughing (because at this point what else can I do) covered in total nastiness while my nephew lays on the seat smiling at me. (Please note to this day he remains a ripster!!!)
So you would think after such incidences that I would have developed amazing diapering skills .. no? That's right .. NO!
Remember how I told you that my son is a world class poopster? Well I think that I am a world class messter of diapering. (Yes I do enjoy making up words. One day you will see a new dictionary on the market written by yours truly).
So here's my current story of the day. AND my tip.
Tip #1 - ALWAYS expect the worst when changing a diaper. Don't think to yourself, 'Self, there's no odor and no oozing, this clearly is just a wet one and it will be fast and easy." By doing this you set yourself up for the following:
I went upstairs to change my son. No odor, no oozing.. so I figured this change would be a snap! (Mistake #1) I laid him on the change table and whipped open that diaper (Mistake #2). I was greeted by foulness! Gagging I reached for the wipes... ONLY to discover that I hadn't restocked my cloth wipes!
Tip #2 - Make sure you have WIPES nearby before you open the diaper.
OH NO... groaning and still trying to hold a squirming infant down with a half open poopy diaper, I reach under the change table to locate my stash of disposable wipes.... I come up empty... RATS NO this cannot be happening.. THEN the unbelievable happens. I sneeze. NOW some of you know me and the volatile potential of an Erin sneeze. When I sneeze I do it right.. ...... there I am eyes watering from the both the smell and the powerful sneeze I just emitted, one hand holding the diaper closed (don't ask me why i didn't just re snap it.. in the moment I wasn't thinking) the other hand trying desperately to reach the closet for some wash cloths to at the very least wipe the mess all over my own face! (how's this for a nasty picture) J is laughing at me the whole time (wonderful son that he is). I managed to grab a few wash cloths (dry mind you) I sop up some of my mess, then proceed to wipe up my son. Just as I finishing up, thinking "phew got through that one" I go to move the dirty diaper without looking properly (Mistake # 3) AND in goes my finger directly into the mess... ARRRHGHHGHGHG.... (that's me screaming) What a fiasco.
Tip #3 - Watch where you reach.
All to bring me to the following conclusion - I HATE poop!
So what have we learned today?
- NEVER assume its just a wet one
- ALWAYS make sure you have wipes BEFORE you open the diaper
- LOOK before reaching! - you never know where your finger will land
- and finally in honour of my Wado who is forever trying to teach me how to sneeze - OPEN your mouth while sneezing - it releases the pressure so everything isn't forced from your nose!
That's all today on my tips for successful diapering. :)
Here's wishing you all a Happy Poopfree day (hopefully!)
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